


wag magtataka, kung bakit ayaw kitang mawala

by inordineight



Category: Thai Actor RPF, บังเอิญรัก | Love by Chance (TV) RPF, เกลียดนักมาเป็นที่รักกันซะดีๆ | TharnType: The Series (TV) RPF, เพราะเราคู่กัน | 2gether: The Series (Thailand TV) RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, DI RIN NAMIN ALAM, F/F, Ghost Ships Galore, M/M, bright and perth as cousins, brightwingulf maybe?, econ gang as in pinagsama-sama lang talaga namin econ majors irl lol, edgebois bright perth mark, fuckboy saint pero di tayo sure, fun fun lang guys HAHAHA, isko!everybody, mentions of uwma cast, perthsaintmark maybe?, sana may marecruit kami sa brightgulf at marksaint agenda, taglish + conyo as fuck
Language: Filipino
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-16
Updated: 2020-09-16
Packaged: 2021-03-07 00:47:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,678
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26498140
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/inordineight/pseuds/inordineight
Summary: Sumama lang si Perth sa gig ng pinsan niya kasi bored siya. And maybe because tumatama na rin yung mga sermon ni Plan about his being asocial. So, fine. Sige, he’ll try to be Bright’s wingman for whoever Wayne Sopas is supposed to be. Hindi niya naman inexpect to meet the future love of his life. Hindi niya rin naman pinlano na makasalubong nila kung sinuman si Gulf sa buhay ni Bright. Hay, ang gulo.Or in which Perth just wants to know the name of the prettiest boy he's ever seen in his life, but gets tangled in his cousin's messy love life instead.
Relationships: Bright Vachirawit Chivaaree/Gulf Kanawut Traipipattanapong, Bright Vachirawit Chivaaree/Win Metawin Opas-iamkajorn, Janistar Phomphadungcheep/Mild Lapassalan Jiravechsoontornkul, Perth Tanapon Sukhumpantanasan/Saint Suppapong Udomkaewkanjana, Prem Warut Chawalitrujiwong/Boun Noppanut Guntachai, Saint Suppapong Udomkaewkanjana/Mark Siwat Jumlongkul
Kudos: 5





	wag magtataka, kung bakit ayaw kitang mawala

“Kuya Bright, bakit kasi ako? Ba’t di na lang si Nanon? Or si Ssing? Mas magaling naman mang-wingman si Kuya Ssing...”

“Kasi nga may date si Ssing tsaka si Jan, ano ba? Ilang ulit ko na to sinabi, Perth.”

“Edi si Nanon! Tayong dalawa yung parehong introvert, pinagsama mo pa.”

“Para namang di tayo mag-pinsan. Paos si Nanon, remember? Dami-daming org na sinalihan magi-inactive din naman pag nag majors na. Buti di ka nahila.”

Bright is driving his new Nissan Almera, dragging his very reluctant pinsan to whatever gig he’s managed to snag for the night. Perth knows it’s not just the payment his Kuya Bright is after. Ever since the semester started, wala nang bukambibig si Bright kundi yung cute Econ major na kaklase niya sa isang GE. Wayne Sopas or something. Di rin naman nakikinig si Perth. Sadyang pareho lang sila ng boarding house kaya no choice. 

“Kuya, alam mo namang wala kong time mag-org. Acads nga hirap na hirap na kong ipasok sa gitna ng shooting, orgwork pa kaya?”

“Di ko pa rin gets how someone as shy as you lands all these commercial work.”

“Ganun talaga pag pogi, Kuya. Sorry if you can’t relate.”

“Ah ganyanan, Milo Boy? Sige, baba ka na ng kotse. Maglakad ka na lang pauwi.”

“Oh tapos? Wala kang wingman?” Binatukan niya ng very slight ang pinsan - saktong nasa red light naman sila. 

Perth takes his phone out, connecting to the car’s speakers and playing his favorite The 1975 playlist on Spotify. 

“Makiki-bluetooth wala namang premium,” ismid ni Bright nang biglang bumulalas sa kotse ang boses ng paborito nilang Spotify ad.  _ Going on a roadtrip? Don’t forget to... _

Perth takes a deep breath, trying to gather his remaining patience. This is a good thing, he tells himself. Umuwi sa Bulacan si Plan for the weekend, and so far, wala pa siyang ibang ka-close sa batch nila. Joining Kuya Bright in his gig in what’s sure to be a student bar can be his ticket to gaining new friends. 

Sure enough, Bright makes the turn that would take them to Maginhawa, and Perth lets his fingers run over the guitar case between his legs. This, at least, is familiar. It’s going to be fine, he thinks. Get a drink, play a set, get more drinks so he can gather enough confidence to socialize and tolerate whatever play at flirting his cousin wants to try on Win Sopas from Econ. 

He takes a quick snap of Bright driving, the street lights warm and bright (hah!) behind him, captions it with “gig night with kuya bright” and his favorite black heart emoji, and sets it as his instagram story. Here goes nothing.

*

The first thing he notices is how the bar isn’t a bar at all, but a converted house. College students are seated in mismatched tables, drinking and chatting and it all looks so cosy, so welcoming. Hindi matandaan ni Perth bakit sobrang opposed niya sa idea in the first place. Bright must notice, because he sends him an encouraging smile and points toward the makeshift stage, where a pretty girl in denim overalls and a crop top was singing acapella.

“Tayo na agad next after ni Mild, kita mo ba si Win?”

Pinakita na ni Bright sa kanya yung instagram ni Wayne before, so Perth thinks he should be able to spot him, especially since hindi naman ganun kadilim yung bar like he was expecting. He scans the crowd, but instead of finding Win, he finds someone else instead.

There, chatting with a group of five or so students, a bottle of Red Horse in one hand, sits the most beautiful man Perth thinks he’s ever had the pleasure of seeing in all his nineteen years of existence. Totoong tao pa ba to? He’s mestizo with soft, brown hair, and smiling doe eyes that lend Mild his full attention. Cover lang naman ng Dead Stars kinakanta niya, mas magaling naman si Perth dyan. 

He suddenly has a vision of brushing his fingers against the curve of this angel's cheek, kahit once lang. Fuck, hindi usually ganto ka-cheesy mag-isip si Perth. But they look so soft… 

Hindi naman si Perth yung tipo nang tao na naniniwala sa love at first sight, pero may first time talaga siguro for everything. Oh, what he wouldn’t do to get that guy’s number. Or at least his name, or sige kahit him in his bed na lang - magkukunwari pa ba siya? All of the above would be better, though. Ano kayang gusto niyang luto ng itlog sa umaga? 

The guy turns in his direction, and Perth feels his heart speed up in his chest as their eyes meet for the barest of seconds, before his gaze slides over to Bright beside him. The guy looks surprised, then turns to elbow someone beside him. Perth frowns, trying to make out the face of the one beside him. The second guy finally turns, and Perth recognizes him immediately -  _ Kuya Win.  _   
“Kuya Bright, I found him na! There’s your Win!”

But Bright isn’t paying attention. In fact, his attention is back on the stage, where Mild was stepping off and joining the table just in front, occupied by three more people, one of which was very familiar to Perth.  _ Kuya Gulf.  _

Fuck.

To be honest, hindi rin alam ni Perth yung buong story between Bright and Gulf. He knows they went to AHS together, and that they were definitely more than friends. Kung umabot ng boyfriends yung label nila, hindi niya sure. He knows lang na the reason Bright went into Engineering was because of Gulf. And now, one year later, nakapag-shift na si Bright into BA, and hindi na dumadaan sa bahay si Gulf. 

“Kuya, let’s play na.”

That seems to snap Bright out of whatever trance he’s in, and they both go up onstage. Perth starts tuning as Bright makes small talk to the crowd. Perth notices na malayo ang tingin ng pinsan niya, as if deliberately ignoring the table immediately in front of them. Sinubukan niyang silipin kung anong reaction ni Kuya Gulf, but the amps are in the way. 

“I’m Bright, and this is my cousin Perth. Wala pa kaming band name, trip trip lang muna haha. So tonight we’ll be playing a couple of covers for you guys, we hope you enjoy.”

Perth hands Bright his guitar, tapping the mic in front of him for a sound check. A high-pitched burst of static comes out, and Perth winces at the sound. At his angel's table (he really needs to know his name), Perth can see him covering Win's ears, his mouth turned down in a frown. He feels his heart drop down to his stomach. He did that, he made the angel frown. Perth feels sick suddenly. He lets go of the mic as if burned, strumming a few chords to distract himself. 

Bright starts to sing, and Perth strums along, letting himself get lost in the music. He knows how to do this, how to play in accompaniment, his fingers and his voice accentuating Bright's own. They've done it since childhood, and the awed, solemn hush that falls over the crowd tells him they're doing it well now. He dares to look up again, finding Kuya Win's friend's eyes on him, a slight smile on full lips.  _ Lord, okay na ko _ , he thinks, grinning unconsciously, meeting that gaze with his own, _ pwede mo na kong kunin. _

There's a riff coming up, and he dares to wink at his angel before turning his focus back on the guitar. From the burst of laughter that comes from their table, Kuya Angel's friends must've seen it too. 

Bright glances sideways at him, a smirk on his lips that dies instantly when Gulf gets up from the table and walks outside, phone in hand. Perth looks down, shy again, and keeps his head down until the end of the set. 

*

“Kuya, andun si Win. Let’s sit there,” Perth convinces, one bottle down and his share of their fee for the night in his pocket.

Lumingon si Bright mula sa usapan nila ng manager, some guy called Captain, and looks him over. 

“I don’t know, Perth. Parang gusto ko na lang umuwi.”

“Nope, di pwede. Kinaladkad mo ko dito tas di mo man lang ako papainumin? Sumbong kita kay Tita.”

“Look, I’ll introduce you. You can stay if you want, kanina mo pa ina-eye fuck yung kasama ni Win.”

Nanlaki mata ni Perth, at binatukan niya na naman ang pinsan dahil sa pasmadong bibig nito. Ang daldal shuta. 

“O tapos? Pano ko uuwi? I’m a freshie, kuya, you can’t leave me here. Ano ba, bakit parang nakakita ka ng multo nung nakita mo si Kuya Gulf?”

Bright rolls his eyes.

“Luh, na-ghost ka ba?”

“Sinong na-ghost?”

Perfect timing si Win, popping up just behind Bright with his cute smile and chubby cheeks. Ano, buong barkada niya ba may cute na cheeks? 

“Hi Kuya! Eto pong pinsan ko, naghahanap ng rebound kasi na-ghost ng taga-Engg.”

Win laughs good-naturedly, and Perth thinks: okay. Sige, the ends justify the means and all that. Sumulyap ulit siya sa table nila, kung san nakikipag-usap at nakikipagtawanan ang future jowa niya sa mga kasama niya. Ramdam ata niya ang titig ni Perth, dahil bigla siyang lumingon at kumaway sa kanya. Putangina, ang cute. 

“I’m Win, Bright and I are classmates sa Comm 3, if he can remember. It’s just the two of us nga lang who are like, not freshies there eh. We’re kind of like titos of the class.”

Perth holds in the laughter threatening to burst out as he sees the look in Bright’s eyes. Wow, his cousin is  _ whipped.  _ Over a conyo kid from Econ. He  _ loves _ this university. 

“Of course I remember,” Bright cuts in smoothly, his arm a sudden, heavy weight over Perth’s shoulders. Ugh, so this is how it’s gonna go. “You’re kind of hard to forget, Win Metawin.”

Win laughs again, pleased. Parang di ata nauubusan ng tawa tong batang to. 

“Good set nga pala, bro. Your voice is amazing. Do you want to join us at our table? Just got a new bucket.” 

“Yes,” Perth answers for them both, making his way to the table he’s been eyeing since the night started. 

“Excited nang pinsan mo,” he hears Win whisper behind him. 

Bright whispers something in response, pero hindi na marinig ni Perth. The moment he gets to the table, his angel stands and pulls out a chair, turning the full power of that charming smile on him. 

“Perth, right? Loved your set.”

Fuck, pati boses niya nakaka-in love. 

“I do,” he answers dreamily. 

“Ha?”

“I mean, thanks. And yes. Perth ako. Pangalan ko. Perth yung pangalan ko, how did you know?”

He laughs, and Perth kind of wants to taste it. 

“Nagpakilala yung pinsan mo onstage kanina. I’m Saint, by the way.”

Saint. Syempre Saint pangalan niya. Sobrang bagay. Hindi rin naman relihiyoso si Perth, pero kung kay Saint lang din naman, parang willing siyang lumuhod at sumamba. 

“Saint,” ulit niya nang marahan, trying out the name on his tongue. 

“This is Janis. That’s Prem and Gigie, and I think you know Win already.”

“Hello po, I’m Perth. Are you all Econ majors?”

“Huy, don’t say po,” banat nung Gigie. She’s pretty, Perth thinks distantly, in that big-eyed morena kind of way. Not as pretty as Saint, though. “Parang we’re so old tuloy. Janis and I are BA but Econ tong tatlong kids, we’re buddy fam sa EcoSoc.”

“Buddy fam?” Perth asks, feeling extra conscious of Saint’s arm on the back of his chair. Konting kembot na lang and his fingers would be touching Perth’s shoulder. He watches Saint. He’s drinking from a bottle na hawak nung kabilang kamay niya, but he looks over at him when Perth leans back, as if asking permission. In response, Perth scoots his chair closer. 

Saint smiles, his fingers closing on Perth’s shoulder. Pwedeng friendly lang yung gesture, pero libre naman mangarap. Perth smiles back. So. Ganto pala yung feeling.

“- so whoever bids the highest gets that buddy. It’s a univ-wide org also so iba-ibang majors yung apps namin. Hello, parang busy kayo dyan magtitigan?”

“Onga eh, parang hangin lang tayo dito,” dagdag ni Prem. 

Perth thinks he blushes. Di siya sure. Parang may sariling utak yung katawan niya when around Saint. 

“Hoy, Warut. Wala naman kaming sinasabi pag magkasama kayo ni Boun ah,” defend ni Saint, laughing good-naturedly. 

“Perth, inom,” he adds, opening another bottle of beer one-handed. Wow. 

“Thanks,” he answers, taking the bottle, ignoring the way his heart jumps in his chest as their fingers brush. Seryoso ba yan, Perth? Ang lala mo. 

Kuya Win’s trying to engage Kuya Bright in the conversation, but his eyes are still on the table in front, where Kuya Gulf is living his best life, ignoring Bright’s whole existence. Perth frowns and kicks his cousin under the table. 

‘Anong ginagawa mo?’ tanong ni Perth, with his eyes. 

Bright looks at him, then at Kuya Gulf’s table. Perth follows, finally noticing bakit bad mood yung pinsan niya. There’s another guy with his arm around Gulf, the same way Saint was holding him. 

Ah. Kaya pala. 

Tinaasan ni Perth si Bright ng kilay. ‘Akala ko ba andito ka para kay Kuya Win?’ tanong ng kilay niya.

“Someone you know?” 

Perth startles sa bulong sa tenga niya. Somehow, Saint’s face is way closer to him than his heart is ready for. 

“Kind of. Kakilala ni kuya. Ex niya ata, I’m not sure.”

“Oooh drama,” asar ni Saint, “ikaw ba? Wala ka namang exes around here, ‘no?”

Mabilis na umiling si Perth. “Nope, single since birth.”

“Are you looking to change that?”

Perth chokes on his Smirnoff Mule, and Saint hurries to thump him on the back.

“Sorry, sorry! Was that too forward?”

Nauubo pa rin si Perth nang maglabas ng water bottle si Saint sa backpack niya. Inabot niya to kay Perth, who gulps it down greedily. 

“If I tell you something, do you promise not to share kay Bright?”

Okay, topic change. Sige, okay lang. 

“Promise,” sagot ni Perth, crossing his heart.

“Win might have a tiny crush on him. Like, first time namin sa tambayan as full mems this sem, diba? This was after our first major class tas wala na siyang ibang bukambibig kundi yung cute guy from his Comm 3 class with the nice singing voice.” 

“Yeah, that checks out. Yung voice niya usually natatandaan ng mga tao about Kuya Bright.”

“Super funny nga eh kasi usually mga mainstream gay pop pinapakinggan ni Win, right? Carly Rae, Taylor Swift, ganyan. Oh, and also this Thai band called Scrubb? Di ko alam san niya nahanap. Anyway, since that first class, puro the 1975 and Daniel Caesar na tugtugan sa condo. LSS pa rin ako sa Somebody Else hanggang ngayon.”

“Oh, you’re roommates?”

“Yeah, sa Blue. Where are you from ba?”

“Maskom, Film.”

“I meant like, san ka nagsstay?” klaro ni Saint, flicking him on the shoulder. Perth would usually be mortified by now, misunderstanding a question like that, but ewan. Saint has this way about him that puts him at ease. Na parang he’ll always have Perth’s best interests at heart. Na para bang Perth can trust na he’ll be safe with him. He knows that’s silly, they just met, but that’s how he feels. Perth isn’t the best judge of character, but his gut tells him na he can trust Saint. So he does. 

“But yeah, you seem like a film major.”

“What’s a film major like?”

Saint smiles. “Quiet. Unassuming. But observant, as in they see everything. Usually nerds, but not like, grade conscious like us. Like nerd as in andaming alam about random things. Masaya ka-late night talks.”

“Ah, ganun ba? Is that from experience or assumption mo lang?”

“Did I get it right ba?”

“I don’t know, di pa naman tayo nag-late night talk ever. Baka ma-bore lang kita.” 

“Well, we won’t know unless we try, right?” bato ni Saint, smoothly pulling out his phone and opening the screen to a new contact. Inabot niya kay Perth. 

“Ew, iOS user ka pala eh.”

Saint rolls his eyes. “Okay, Android.”

“I prefer handwritten letters, actually. Para walang away.”

“Pwede rin naman, kung maintindihan mo handwriting ko.”

“It can’t be that bad,” Perth answers, smiling. Eto na yun, right? This is flirting? Saint is literally asking for his number, so he thinks he must be doing something right. 

He looks to Kuya Bright for reassurance, but it seems na he’s finally turned his full attention to Kuya Win. Good. 

He takes Saint’s phone, but before he can, it rings with a call.  _ Mark Siwat _ . 

Perth frowns. Now that’s a familiar name.

Saint swipes the phone before he can ask him about it.

“Um, teka lang Perth ah. I have to take this.” 

Perth finishes his drink and notices na bigla na tumayo si Bright, saan naman kaya pupunta to? Before he could ask him, nakaalis na ang Kuya Bright nagmamadali, baka naiihi. Wait a minute, tingin sya table ni Gulf, wala na ung dalawa. So one plus one equals sinundan ni Bright si Gulf.

Perth hears Win, “Oh, samahan kita?” pero nakaalis na nga ang Bright.

“San punta ng bebe mo?” tanong ni Janis.

“Di ko nga alam eh, bigla na lang umalis, weird.”

“Baka naiihi nga mars, so ano na san ka matutulog mamaya? Iuuwi ka na ba nyan?”

“Gagi mukhang dami ngang iniisip eh, kanina pa ako nagdadaldal tungkol sa the 1975, tango lang ng tango.”

“Can’t relate sa 1978 na yan mars, kung ako sayo tanungin mo na if he likes you para masimulan na ang gabing ito skksksks”

“Naol may ganyang confidence,” Win pouts.

Perth hears everything, kunwari umiinom pero alam niya tinopak na naman Kuya Bright niya. So he excuses himself from the table to follow Bright. 

“Baby boy, are you sure? Medyo di na diretso lakad mo,” sabi ni Gigie, concern evident in her voice. So maybe it’s not unfounded. Perth was never much of a drinker. 

“Wait, bakit wala na rin si Saint?” tanong ni Prem. 

“Prem, lagi kang late sa balita. Isa lang naman dahilan pag biglang nawawala si Saint, diba?”

“Ano nga?”

“Kung di mo alam, di ko sasabihin.”

Okay, step right, step left, right, left, right, left. Door! Yes, nasa exit na siya. To find Kuya Bright...

“I’m out with Janis and the others. Bebe’s kami, sunod ka if you want.”

Hindi yun boses ni Kuya Bright, though. That’s his angel. Saint, sorry. His name’s Saint. He has to stop calling Saint angel in his head. Parang demotion. Mas mataas ba rank ng angel sa saint? Tinuro ba yun sa CL nung high school? Di niya matandaan.

“Really, again? Kagagaling ko lang dyan this morning. You know I would love to - mmm, yes that sounds amazing, actually. No. Nooooo, I’m really sorry, but I can’t. Bawi ako, promise. Okay. Okay, I’ll see you soon, Mark. Yes, I promise. Okay, I will. Bye bye.”

“Sino yun?” Perth asks, letting a hint of a whine into his voice. Usually gumagana yun. Sa mga pinsan niya, not in potential jowas. 

He doesn’t think gumana, if the way na tinititigan siya ni Saint was any indication. Taas kilay extravaganza, but Perth doesn’t let it deter him. He has the power of unlimited confidence (thanks to the three, four? bottles of smule na nainom niya na) on his side. 

“Yung nasa phone,” he insists, letting his bottom lip jut out, “sino yun?”

“Just a friend,” sagot ni Saint, tucking a stray strand of hair behind Perth’s ear. Right, tagal niya nang plano magpagupit. 

“Sure?”

The hand on Perth’s ear moves to cup his cheek. Di niya na mapigilan, Perth closes his eyes. He can feel Saint’s breath in his face. Shit, eto na ba yun? First kiss niya na ba to?

“Yung pinsan mo ba yun?” bulong ni Saint.

Perth blinks his eyes open. Ngumuso si Saint to something behind him, and he turns around to find Kuya Bright in what looks like a heated conversation with Kuya Gulf and his friend. 

Hinila niya si Saint behind one of the plantboxes, pulling him down to a crouch para di sila makita nung tatlo.

“Gulf, long time no see.”

“Bright, anong ginagawa mo dito?”

Perth can see Bright clench his jaw, a sure sign of frustration. Or that malapit na siyang manapak. That can’t be good.

“Tumugtog ako kanina, di mo ba narinig? Harap na harap kayo diba? You used to love it when I sing. You used to love it when I did lots of things.” 

Gulf steps back. The guy behind him puts a hand on his arm. Bad move, Perth thinks. Parang di ata nagustuhan ni Bright yun.

“I meant here, sa smoking area. Akala ko nag-quit ka na?”

“Well, you would know if bumalik ako if you answered my messages. Pero mukhang may iba ka nang kausap so…”

“Ako ba yun?” singit nung kasama ni Gulf, “Bro, gusto ko lang talaga mag-yosi. La kong kinalaman sa LQ niyo or whatever.” 

“Shut up, Yacht. Bumalik ka na nga sa loob.”

“Dude, are you kidding me? No! Ano gagawin ko dun, magt-third wheel kay Kaownah at Turbo habang nagbabalak si Mild pormahan yung ate girl na mestisa sa kabilang table? Nope, I refuse.”

“Is he talking about Janis?” tanong ni Saint, his voice too close. Perth can’t concentrate, sa totoo lang. Stuck pa rin yung utak niya sa na-overhear niyang convo kanina. Sobrang familiar talaga nung name na Mark Siwat. Sino ba kasi yun?

“I think?” sagot ni Perth. 

His body feels too heavy, suddenly. He sits down, letting his legs stretch out on the floor. He can feel his body leaning on Saint, the other wrapping an arm around his shoulders protectively. Pakshet, ang bango. Amoy future jowa talaga. Medyo di na nararamdaman ni Perth yung mukha niya, pero okay lang kung ganto naman kalapit si Saint sa kanya. He has another sudden vision - this time of his bed sa boarding house, sitting there with Saint and watching the spectacular view of the sunset with Daniel Caesar and H.E.R in the background singing Best Part from the windows tuwing TTh pag wala siyang afternoon class. Wow. He wants that to happen so bad.

Kuya Bright’s and Kuya Gulf’s voices are getting louder, and he tries to tune in back to their conversation.

“Ikaw ba may-ari? Ano, bawal na kong magsama ng tao dito kasi andito ka rin? Get over yourself, Bright.”

“Ang dali lang kasi para sayo makalimot, Gulf. Kasi ako, kahit san ako magpunta sa pagkalaki-laking university na to, naalala pa rin kita. Then the first night na sinubukan kong bumalik dito, where we spent so many nights together, andito ka rin. Ang unfair lang.” 

“I’m gonna- ano. CR. Punta kong CR, ha, Gulf? Usap muna kayo,” biglang sabi ni Yacht, sabay layas. 

When Gulf speaks again, it’s in a voice too soft for Perth to hear. 

“Saint, ansabe? Di ko marinig.”

Saint’s playing with his hair again. It feels so good Perth closes his eyes. 

“Sabi ni Gulf - tama ba, Gulf? - mukhang masaya naman daw si Bright. Nakita niya atang magkausap sila ni Win.”

“Tapos sinagot ni Bright bakit daw siya nasama sa usapan.”

“I’m just saying that you seem fine without me. Matagal na tayong tapos, Bright. Wag na natin balikan.”

Siguro dapat medyo nag-guilty si Perth, spying on his cousin like this. But Saint’s fingers in his hair are so gentle, his arms around him so comfortable and safe. Ayaw niya nang gumalaw, dito na lang siya hanggang sumikat ulit yung araw.

“Ikaw lang naman yung tumapos, Gulf. Tas ngayon ikaw din yung nagdala ng ibang lalaki in what’s supposed to be  _ our  _ place. Bakit ganun?”

“First of all, he's not my guy. Second, wala nang our place kasi wala na tayo.”

The voice in which Bright says his words next is heartbreaking enough to bring Perth out of his tipsy state.

“Ano ba kasing dahilan? I just need to know the reason para may closure na. I can't even talk to Win nang maayos, kasi natatakot na ako ma-attach and maulit yung nangyari satin.”

“Kelangan ba may reason? I don't really know, Bright. Maybe we just outgrew each other. Isn't that enough? I just woke up one day and you were talking about shifting and ewan. Inisip ko dapat malungkot ako kasi we won't be seeing each other as much kung ganun kaso wala. I didn't really feel anything, Bright.”

“What? So this was about shifting thing again? I wouldn’t have done it if you said so, Gulf. I would have done anything for you.”

“No, Bright. It was about me not caring about you shifting.”

“I think we should go,” Saint says, “okay ka na? Kaya mong tumayo?”

Perth nods. He thinks he's heard enough. Kumapit siya sa braso ni Saint as he stands, blinking a few times until pumatag yung sahig. Okay, so maybe he'll stick to one bottle lang next time. 

Saint doesn't let him go as they walk back inside, Bright's and Gulf's voices fading away. 

"O, asan na si Janis?" bungad ni Saint pagbalik nila sa loob. 

Gigie and Prem were talking to someone through video call, a fresh plate of nachos and a full pitcher of something red on their table. Perth eats greedily, desperate to have something non-alcoholic in his stomach. 

"Andun sa kabila, lumalandi. Look," sagot ni Prem, pointing his chin at Gulf's old table where Janis had a hand on the pretty singer's arm from earlier, Mild. 

"Wala talagang straight sa inyo?" tanong ni Perth, his mouth filled with nachos and his usual filter dissolved by the alcohol. 

The entire table laughs. Beside him, Saint produces yet another bottle of water for Perth. 

"How sure are you na hindi straight yang katabi mo?" Gigie asks, a twinkle in her eyes. Shuta, the visuals on this group. Bawal pangit sa barkada nila? Requirement ba yun sa colleges on their part of the campus? 

"Oo nga, may nangyari na ba nung umalis kayo?" kantyaw ni Prem, pointing the phone's front cam at them. 

Saint laughs, waving at the guy on the phone. 

"Hi, Kuya Boun! This is Perth, he played guitar kanina." 

"Hi po," Perth greets, wiping at his mouth. 

Saint tsks and takes out a handkerchief to do it for him. 

"Hala ka, Saint. Freshie pa ata yan, may gatas pa sa labi oh." 

"Nagsalita?" Gigie exclaims, taking the phone, "parang you didn't do the same kay Prem last year?" 

"To answer your question, si Gigie yung token straight ng group," Saint says, smiling like they're sharing a secret. 

Perth, helplessly, smiles back. 

"Ano na kaya nangyari kay Win tsaka sa pinsan mo?" tanong ni Prem, "iuuwi na ba siya nun? Pwede na ba kong mauna?" 

"Wait, asan po si Win? Di sila magkasama ni Kuya."

"Really? Sabi ni Win pupuntahan niya daw kuya mo eh." 

"Hoy, Premium," singit ulit ni Gigie, "Anong mauuna? San ka na naman pupunta?"

"Nagkita si Ohm at Fluke today. Pag nagkikita sila, andami laging binbake ni Fluke. Need ko maunahan si Sammy bago niya ubusin yung tira." 

"Kelan ba kasi magbubukas ng ig shop yang si Fluke?" tanong ni Saint, "miss ko na carrot cupcakes niya." 

"You're going home because you're a pataygutom? Is that it?" 

"I have my priorities in order," defend ni Prem, standing up to kiss Gigie sa cheek. 

He says his goodbyes, drops by Mild’s table to do the same, and leaves.

“Fluke and Sammy are Prem’s roommates,” explain ni Gigie, drinking from Prem’s bottle like a pro, “Tas si Ohm, batchmate ko, boyfriend ni Fluke. They met last year...” 

*

Tahimik si Bright, wala na siyang masabi. Ang sakit nung mga wordszxx ni Gulf, tagos sa left ventricle ng heart niya. 

Natahimik rin ni si Gulf, alam niyang he hit a nerve. Nag-iisip siya ng way to lighten the convo, pero wala siyang maisip.

“How bout now?” tanong ni Bright.

“What do you mean?”

“How do you feel about me now?”

It’s now Gulf’s turn to be speechless. Daming tumatakbo sa isip niya like, what if ‘di na lang niya iniwan si ere si Bright? Sila pa rin kaya hanggang ngayon? What if di na lang siya implusive na person, tipong pinag-iisipan muna yung mga bagay bagay bago siya nagdecide na wala na siyang feelings for Bright? And now here he is asking him that question, kung may feelings pa siya. Ano na Kanawut? Make up your mind!

“Okay, it’s fine if you don’t answer me, alam ko naman na yata yung sagot.”

Gulf lights another Marlboro Blue, isang matinding, malalim na hithit, na parang ung sagot sa tanong ni Bright mahahanap nya sa dulo nung yosi,

Kukunin ni Bright yung yosi from his lips before he could get it, tas hihithit din si Bright ng malalim.

“Di rin nagbago taste mo no? Ito pa rin yosi mo nung una kitang tinuruan remember?”

Gulf, internally:  _ gago alala ko lahat _ .  _ Akala mo ikaw lang nakakaalala ng mga shit? Ako rin kaya, fuck! Ano na may feelings pa ba ako for you? _

“Baka kasi old habits die hard lang kaya ganun. Wag kang feeling.”

“Ah, eh ba’t ang bilis mo ko bitawan nun?”

Hindi na kaya ni Gulf yung mga pamind games ni Bright so he says, “Tara pasok na tayo.”

“Teka meron pa oh, ubusin mo na.”

Gulf takes the cig from Bright’s hand, binilisan niya paghithit then he drops the butt on the floor. 

Pagpasok ni Bright at Gulf, napansin ni Gigie so she gestures to Win, na bumalik na rin sa table. Lilingon si Win and sees them together. Mapapansin ni Bright yung annoyed look ni Gulf. He turns to Gulf’s table at makikitang naglalandian na si Janis at Mild.

“Gusto mo dito ka na lang samin?” Bright offers. Gulf is reluctant pero nung nakita niya sina Yacht, KN at Turbo na nasa table na nina Bright, pumayag na rin siya. 

“Psst, Perth hilain mo nga yung upuan jan sa kabilang table,” utos ni Kuya Bright.

Perth eyes Bright, “Sure ka?”

Bright, in confusion: “Huh? Abot mo na yung upuan.” 

Perth complies, uurong niya upuan niya to make room for Gulf. He moves his chair without thinking so pag-urong niya mapapalapit siya kay Saint. Saint smirks at the sudden movement, with no intention of moving his chair. Naamoy na naman ni Perth yung scent ni Saint na may halong alak, ba't ganun parang amoy bulaklak pa din? Tama ba yun? Tao pa ba talaga si Saint? 

“Mukhang wrong move ata na dinala ng insan mo si Gulf dito. Look at Win,” Saint whispers.

Hindi nagregister yung sinabi ni Saint, kasi busy si Perth iinternalize yung scent ni Saint, tsaka yung kanyang cheeks, tsaka yung kanyang neck, ang ganda ng neck niya parang ang sarap halikan. Shit. Focus. Tanapon. Magkaka-riot na dito!

It took every strength in Perth’s body to turn to Win, nakakahumaling si Saint this close, ‘di siya makahinga, Shit! Focus nga Tanapon, eh! 

If looks could kill, baka kung san na nadampot si Gulf, pansin ni Perth. Iba yung tingin ni Win even under the dim lights. Bobo mo talaga Kuya Bright! Bakit mo pa pinagbubuksan ng RH yan ughhh! 

“Thanks…” Gulf says. 

“Nga pala guys this is Gulf, my former...uhmm….my friend,” Bright pauses awkwardly. Gulf looks at Bright sharply. 

“Nice to meet you Gulf!” Perth hears Saint say. Good save, Saint! Isa ka talagang biyaya, you’re my hero. 

Gulf manages a smile, “Nice to meet you rin.”

But before Perth knew it, may narinig na syang sarcasm sa tone ni Win, “So where did you two meet?”

Perth thinks, nako yari na tayo dito! 

Amidst the tension in the air, di nila mamamalayan na nagsneak out na si Kaownah at Turbo. Actually mapapansin ni Yacht at Saint pero alam na nila kung anong mangyayari. Back to more pressing matters.

“High school classmates kami,” Gulf answers.

“Ah ganun ba, sorry di ka kasi nabanggit ni Bright samin EVER.”

Everybody noticed the hint of shade ni Win dun. This was getting awkward, Perth thought. He was trying to get his insan’s attention -  _ tingin ka dito gago! _ When he finally managed to get Bright to look at him, minata na naman niya yung message, ‘ _ Anong gagawin mo dito? Onti na lang mag-rarayot na oh!’ _

Bright, for some unknown reason, understood that and says, “Order pa tayong drinks, Captain isa pa ngang bucket please!” 

“Ah ganun ba? Baka ganun talaga pag parte ng past, di na pinag-uusapan pa,” Gulf bites back. 

Perth hears Saint mutter, “Shiiiiiiiiit.” 

Natahimik si Win, round 1 po kay Gulf mga kasama, sino naman po kaya mananalo sa round 2? 

Saint whispers to Perth, “Pustahan tayong 500 uuwi si Bright with Win.” 

“Luh kita mo nga tameme yung bata mo kay Kuya Gulf eh, geh talo ka pag di magkasama uuwi BrightWin,” Perth dares. 

“Luh BrightWin ka jan. Kala ko ba BrightGulf ka?” tanong ni Saint.

“Shh ayan na round 2 na.”

“Eh kayo pano kayo nagkakilala ni Bright?” asks Gulf.

“Classmates kami sa Comm 3,” Win replies coldly. 

“Ah ehem ayan na ung beer, thank you Boss,” pasigaw na si Bright. 

“Ay order tayo pulutan, what do you guys like? Nachos, calamari?” Win initiates. 

Gulf turns to Bright, “Di ba allergic ka sa pusit?” Gulf says this in a louder tone, para rinig ng dapat makarinig. 

Win raises an eyebrow, “Ah so nachos na lang, di mo naman nasabi Bright na may mga allergies ka pala.” 

“Next time kasi magtatanong,” Gulf replies. 

Oof, sabi nung mata ni Perth kay Saint, mukhang matatalo ka na ah. Saint shakes his head. Di pa tapos yan, malakas yata si Win. 

“Edi next time ikaw na magluto para there’s no problem!” di na napigilan ni Win.

Shit, talo si Gulf sa round na to. Paglingon ni Perth kay Saint, ngumingiti na si Saint. 

“O guys chill,” sabi ni Bright, “O tagay muna cheers!” 

Tatagay ang buong table, inaabangan na naman nina Perth, Saint, Yacht at Gigie ang susunod na round, when Gulf says, “I’m sorry, marami na yata akong nainom. Sorry Win, that was rude.”

Win looks at Gulf intently, parang tinitingnan niya kung sincere ba yung apology ni Gulf, mukhang sincere naman, “I’m sorry too.”

“‘Yan tama yan, no fighting, tamang inom lang,” halakhak si Yacht. Yacht catches Giggie staring at him and he blushes, then he drinks some more. Gigie giggles sa gedli. 

Perth follows, drinking bottle after bottle on the table. He remembers brief flashes of laughter, feeling freer and more uninhibited than he thinks he’s ever been. 

The last thing Perth remembers with any sort of clarity is Saint helping him get to Bright’s car. 

_ “Perth ayusin mo yung lakad, dito, no no hindi jan matatamaan mo si ate, hahahaha okay yan tama yan-” _

And then, nothing.

*

Saint lays Perth down sa kama niya, staring fondly at his sleeping face. He pulls his jacket off, covering him with a blanket he finds at the foot of the bed. He managed to get Perth to change from his jeans into sleep shorts before he fell asleep for good. 

“Plan, okay na ko,” Perth mumbles, turning on his side, “okay na.”

Oh. So he talks in his sleep. Cute.

He stares at Perth for a little while longer, the parted lips, the soft hair falling over his forehead. Sumimple siya nang halik sa pisngi nito, delighting in the way Perth smiles unconsciously as he does so. Cute (2). 

He goes out of the room and into the kitchen, taking a glass from the rack and filling it up with cold water from a pitcher sa ref before going back sa kwarto ni Perth and leaving it at his bedside. He also takes a post-it from the open backpack on the floor, leaving his number and a note. 

“Bright, una na ko. Nice to meet you,” bati niya paglabas.

“Oh, thanks for taking care of Perth, ah. Are you taking a Grab ba? I can book for you. Sorry ah, naabala ka pa.”

“Uy, it’s not a bother. Your cousin’s really sweet.”

Bright looks at him in a way that says he’s sizing him up. Saint feels himself stand a little straighter. 

“He is. Sobrang mahiyain din, so I took him out tonight to meet new friends,” Bright says, emphasizing the word  _ friends. _

Saint just smiles, making his way out.

Ten minutes later, he’s knocking at Mark’s door. The way there is familiar, the length of Esteban Abada as familiar as the streets of his hometown.

“Sabi mo to text when I get home,” he types, “I’m outside your apartment. Let me in.”

“Oh, akala ko busy ka?” bati ni Mark when he opens the door, his eyes sleepy, bedroom hair sticking up in all directions.

Pansin ni Saint yung suot na old class shirt ni Mark, his own brand of sleepwear. It makes him look younger, softer. Alagain ba, tipong gusto niyang balutin ng kumot at yakapin sa kama. But he resists the urge for now. Saint rolls his eyes, pushing his way past the other guy and into his bedroom.

“Maaaark, pagod na ko,” reklamo niya, sabay dapa sa kama as if it was his own, “ba’t di ka sumunod?”

Mark joins him, bringing a glass of water and a change of clothes.

“Alam mo namang di ako umiinom.” 

“Pwede ka pa rin naman sumunod, we wouldn’t have forced you to.”

“As if I can say no to you,” sumbat ni Mark, getting up to lock the doors and close the lights. 

Saint takes the time to change, letting the familiar sight of his bedroom lull him to a sense of calm. Ilang gabi na rin ba ginugol niya in this very room, falling asleep with his arms around its owner?

Mark has barely sat on the bed when Saint pulls him into a warm embrace. 

“I met someone tonight,” bulong niya, pilit na inaaninag ang mukha ni Mark sa dilim. Hindi naman kailangan, kabisado niya na lahat ng tungkol kay Mark by now.

He can feel Mark’s body curve his body into his own. Like this, walang ibang gustong gawin si Saint kundi pumikit, enjoying Mark’s familiar scent, his warmth, the shape of his body against his like puzzle pieces locking together perfectly. 

“Hmmm, I know,” sagot ni Mark, “kita ko mga stories ni Gigie. Yung freshie sa college ko, right? Si Perth?”

“Yeah, he’s really cute.”

Mark doesn’t answer, surging forward to capture Saint’s mouth in a kiss. Saint lazily raises his arm, holding Mark’s face with one hand as he deepens the kiss. Mark licks into his mouth, rolling them over so he’s on top of Saint, legs tight around his waist and both hands locked over his shoulders. 

“Mark,” he gasps, tearing himself away, “pagod na talaga ko. Sorry.”

“Pagod ka ba talaga?” tanong ni Mark, a hint of frustration in his voice. The whole time they’ve had this little arrangement, nagkasundo na sila to respect each other’s boundaries. Saint should be offended, he thinks, na Mark doesn’t seem to do so this time, pero kasi he looks so good like this, above him, frustration drawing his brows together, his lips red and swollen from their kisses. 

“Yes, mads. Sorry na,” lambing ni Saint, habang hinahaplos ang likod ni Mark hanggang sa tuluyan na siyang dumagan sa kanya, tucking his face into Saint’s neck.

“Daya mo naman eh,” mukmok ni Mark, “lam mo namang weakness ko when you call me that.”

“Mads,” ulit ni Saint, one hand on the base of Mark’s spine, the other patting his hair, “cuddle na lang kita like this, tara. And I’ll make you breakfast in the morning, ano?”

“I want longsilog. May iniwan na vigan longganisa si Tito Kao kanina.”

“Deal,” sagot ni Saint, brushing back Mark’s hair from his forehead and pressing a kiss there.

He rolls them over, spooning Mark and pulling the blankets over them both. 

“Good night, mads,” bulong niya, habang yakap si Mark nang mahigpit. 

**Author's Note:**

> hello fun fun lang talaga to, it's not meant to strictly reflect the artists' personalities. di rin kami sure san siya pupunta lmao. this is a collab between me and cass-walang-ao3, we've been discussing a shit ton of AU ideas na never namin nasulat nang maayos so here's our first try. comments and criticism are welcome! xx


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